Wednesday, August 31, 2011

My Self Esteem Needs Constant Maintenance... Even Today

I kinda sorta go back and forth with the whole idea of this blog. Part of me wants to use this as a tool to speak positive and optimism over my life and the things I want to accomplish. But then I want to keep it real and be upfront about myself and how I feel. I'm torn... well whatever...

Last time I checked I was about 240 something pounds. I'm not proud of that weight. I'm not proud that I rock a size 18 at 5'2. It seems that I am just not able to control my weight. I look at other smaller people and wish I could have that gene that keeps people from packing on the weight.. I mean I believe there is such a gene... right?!?!

But one thing I can say is that I have accepted my size and the arduous task that I must work extra hard to control my weight. This does weigh heavy on my self esteem. I think the worst feeling that attributes to the wavering self gratitude is the fact that I want to get to a smaller size so bad, but I just can't seem to "get it" like most people. I haven't mastered the art of weight maintenance like most everyone else. And that makes me feel like people are looking at me and saying, "Wow, she has no self discipline". I care a lot what others think because they do pass judgment based off of personal appearance.

As a part of my life goals I have written goals in order to keep my self esteem from becoming low. In addition to working out and eating right I have also included a few objectives to help me in the personal appearance department.

#1--Everytime I get my paycheck I have to buy myself 2 outfits.
So I have learned that when you look great, you feel great. It took a while to understand what types of clothes flatter my figure well, but once I got the general science down, shopping became fun. Trying different pieces and style variations really stirred up an appreciation for myself. Also it is important for me to stay with current trends and adapt them to my personal style. I've realized in order for me to remain competitive with my peers I need to keep my wardrobe fresh and updated. Staying relevant with today's trends go a long way when constantly meeting new people. People judge you by what you look like. I've realized that an unkempt appearance can be an obstacle while making new friends and establishing a business rapport with new clients. I've decided to never let my personal appearance be the first roadblock to success.

#2--Everytime I get my paycheck I have to get the dawgs all pretty.
And by dawgs I mean the toes. There is something to say about getting your feet done and then showing them off in sandals. It makes me feel pretty. Its like by taking time to do something for me, I instantly feel important, and feel I require special handling. This is an incredible feeling.

My hair doesn't have to be Hollywood Glam, but it definitely has to be presentable. I believe the easiest thing to do to make you look a million bucks is to get a hairstlye that looks great. Don't go out with your hair in ponytails all the time. It works with some looks, but with others it looks lazy. I realized that a nice updoo with jeans and a simple black tee can make you look fab instantly. Just think about it and try it out.

Well these tips work for me... I'm always looking for simple ways to just boost my esteem a little. I swear, once I stopped looking to everyone else to make me happy and started paying attention to what I looked like and how I enjoyed my time, life started becoming a little more exciting!!

MUAH!!! Kisses to the wind... someone will bring em back!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

My Cheetah Lingerie in the Workplace

Today was my first day at work in the great city of "Atlanta". And nobody knew the secret of why I felt so sexy and domineering today... I believe it had everything to do with my cheetah camisole set. Under my business attire the whole safari jungle was lurking beneath ready to pounce on the poor wretched soul that dared to tempt me... Mmmmm Hmmmm...

Monday, August 15, 2011

Deep Wave Quick Weave Tutorial

So I don't think most of you all know about me, but when it comes to hair, I am a WEAVE-A-HOLIC!!! I have been doing my own weaving styles since I was in high school. But what I love most is the quick weave techniques where you can create a totally new hairstyle in about an hour or less, depending on how complex you want it. I've done a few tutorials myself after I was inspired by many of the other great Quick Weave Divas on Youtube.

This tutorial is kinda simple. It only involves one type of hair. I honestly love it, but hey, I haven't had too many hairstyles that I didn't like. Enjoy!!

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Petite Big Boned Women Get No Love From Clothing Stores

So, me and my sister went on an impromptu shopping trip. Sometimes I get really picky on where I shop because my sizes are really hard to find. I am a petite 5' 1 1/2" with so much junk in the trunk that only a size 18 can cover. I mean really, my ass is so bodacious... It is extremely hard trying to find clothes that fit me right. I like to wear petite clothing because the fit is proportionate to women who stand 5'4" or less. But to find something in a size 18... nearly impossible. Then when I try on Women's sizes or Plus Sizes, the bodice is really loose fitting and doesn't hug my curves and the crotch in the pants usually hangs low and bulk up and makes me look like I have a groin... this is not cute sexy or attractive at all (womp womp womp).

I'm not sure if I'm whining or launching a campaign for Petite Big Boned women but I really wish a retailer would understand there is a Petite Big Boned niche that needs to have clothes
that fit. I can say that I have only found one line of clothing that caters especially to us. I discovered "Source of Wisdom", a line I've only seen in Torrid.

I bought a pair of "Source of Wisdom" blue jeans a while ago. They were a size 1S. "S" stands for short. The only other options were "T" for tall and "R" for regular. And the way these pants hugged my beautiful curves was amazing. I swear when I got them home I laid across the bed gazing into the mirror in awe of how great my ass looked. I threw on some heels and strutted across the room. I even made a pitcher of lemonade in them. And as I was sipping a glass of lemonade I went onto my balcony and did a little pose for my peeping toms, just in case they were

I'm still on the hunt for great fits for Petite Big Boned bodies, but until then, I will be satisfied with every color of these "Source of Wisdom" jeans I just bought. I swear... I love my ass! MUAH!!! Kisses to the wind shugas!